An Act of Kindness

When I walk down the streets of Yaoundé I generally would not consider Cameroonians as the most open minded and nicest people. The tone on the market and in the taxi is more rough than gentle. Everyone has their own goal in mind; everyone wants the lowest price or has to get to work as fast as possible.

But the other day I was waiting on a taxi, not very far from my home. I just came from the dry cleaners and my hands were completely full. The sun had already set and I was eager to get home. Even though it was not far at all no taxi wanted to stop. After a while a regular car stopped and opened the window.

“Where do you need to go?” asked a young gentleman. He was well dressed, sitting in a Mercedes with tinted windows and asking a whole question. Subject object verb. All there. Instead of “Where?!”

“Just to the Tradex in Eleveur!”

“Let’s go!”

Getting in the car I had to think of my mother and probably all mothers on this planet for that matter while breaking the sacred law: “Never get into a car with anyone you don’t know” But to be honest, I felt more comfortable in this car than in most taxis. Especially taking “personnells”, regular cars which owners want to gain a little money on the way to work sometimes seams shady and I always hope to get anywhere safe. For some reason it felt alright. Maybe because this was a fancy car. And I consider fancy: all windows intact, the doors properly working, the trunk does not open by itself anytime it gets bumpy, the seats were not ripped (!). (I have never before seen a car like this in Cameroon)

And in fact a couple of minutes later we reached the Tradex where I always descend. Meanwhile we made small talk about this and that. It was nice. To top it off, he did not expect any money. I have met people who had done less for me who wanted a little something. Walking home, I could not get over it how nice this was. Sure, again, he only drove me because he felt sorry for the little white girl. He probably would not have stopped for a Cameroonian girl. For now I did not want to think this thought.

I wanted to enjoy this. And a train of thought started. What if this this act of kindness was an eye opener and not rare at all? In fact what if how I experience people on the streets every day is just a mask, a shield. Because come to think of it, all Cameroonians I got to meet closer than just small talk were the most incredible and warm hearted people. From being invited to dinner, to braiding my hair, to taking me home. And I thought of all the lovely people I met who all had an act of kindness for me.

I thought of a lady on the market that remembered me: “Ah, ma copine!” Ah, my friend. She was one who did not want extraordinary much money from me. How nice to be remembered.

I thought of colleague who drove me home because it was after dark when we finished with our operation and it was my first week and still getting to know my way around.

There was this little girl I did not know who came up running to me and hugging me so tight I immediately had to grin.

I thought of my friend for whom it goes without saying that he takes me home, up to my doorstep, after we meet.

I also thought of my roommate who, when she cooks, always saves a plate for me.

There are friends who text me if I got home okay.

There was this taxi driver who called me back after I already got off because my phone slipped out of my pocket. In a place people always warned me about thieves and taxi rides.

I realized I could go on like this for a while.

Of course there is still a lot going on here that makes me sad. I know people have to be careful here and meeting all those sweet people does not mean there are no harmful things going on. I am careful and I hope I never have to experience any of this sort. But this act of kindness made me realize something really important. And warmed my heart in such a lovely matter. Remember that not everything is as it seems on the first impression.

I realized I wanted to give all this back and meet more people with such an act of kindness also. So while (again- I think it’ a pattern!) waiting for a taxi I heard this lady next to me wanting to go in the same direction. It was after dark, she had a baby on her back and another one tired and bored by her hand. We waited for a long time. So I decided to take a depot- a taxi for myself, and ask the lady to come with. Finally I found a car and we settled on a price. But suddenly the driver let someone else get in. This was not the way to go when someone is willing to pay for a depot. I told him this. I was not going to pay the full price for a depot, since this was not a depot. “Ah, La blanche does not want to help this man!” I got mad in a very German matter: Of course I want to help, but this was not about helping, this was about his greed. I am not willing to pay for something I don’t receive, it was not about money for me it was about principle. Yes, I know. Very cliché German. And I got mad because I just thought about how I wanted to help and show my kindness and immediately this taxi driver full of greed accuses me of not wanting to help people. Oh, sweet irony. I told him the price I was willing to pay, he ignored me. When we arrived and I did not pay the price we settled on first, he got so aggressive. First he did not let me out of the locked car, this did make me feel uncomfortable. But once he did let me out of the car in his rage we started arguing. Instantaneously there were five men surrounding us, asking what happened. With the driver’s yelling they listened to me. I thought they did this only to know what’s going on to have something to tell at the dinner table, but they actually wanted to help. I told them everything (in French! I was a little proud) and they agreed with me. All these men had my back and told the driver he was a greedy jerk and that he was wrong. I felt so safe in this moment. I was not even involved in the rest of the discussion, this was between them. It even continued so far that this man paid the rest of the money. Which of course was never my intent, I felt very uncomfortable, but it showed me how people cared. And this warmed my heart.

Oh, and karma again. I wanted to give something back, be nice, be helpful. But I get in trouble again and instantly there is this help back. Potentiated to millions.